THE MOMENTS OF MY MADNESS

the moments of my madness
in the moments of my madness
I stand and acknowledge the sun
it’s golden rays punish me
scrub me with the idea of god’s grace
grace like the light from distant stars
which existed long ago
but are now extinct
strangled by the procession of time
murdered and butchered into intervals
seconds
minutes and hours
days and weeks and months
years and decades and centuries
light years
a cloud blocks out the sun
in the moments of my madness
and I am again aware of this world
the screaming baby
being dragged along by her mother’s arm
the roar of a motorcycle over there on the street
the sudden commotion at a table
when a cup of tea is knocked over
and the hot water splashes legs and laps
the man standing over my shoulder
pretending to be looking away
he could be a narc or a horse thief
for all I know
or the single black kid in this scene
dancing to the beat in his headphones
as a dog barks and snarls at him
the young mother
who bends over her son’s stroller
suddenly stripper-like
revealing the bottoms of her ass cheeks
the lump of her muff
all these things that happen
these flashes of images
moments of sound
that fill in the seconds and minutes
the days and years that make up a lifetime
I take them all in
absorb them like so many soldiers
retreating from a vast opposing army
I do this all
while sitting in a chair
on a sidewalk in the world
before that cloud passes by
and I stand again
to acknowledge the sun
in the moments of my madness