THE SADDEST MAN IN THE WORLD
He stood up on the train
and looked around,
collecting everybody’s attention.
After a few moments he shouted,
“I might just be
the saddest person
on the planet right now.”
We all stared at him,
wondering about his next move.
Nothing happened for a minute
but then some other guy
a few seats down stood up,
looked at the first man and yelled,
I’m the saddest man in the world right now.
I’m so down,
I’m underneath the earth!”
“no, no!” screamed the woman next to him.
“your sadness is a speck of sand
compared to mine.
My sadness is a whole ocean’s beaches!”
I didn’t know how long it would go on
but I knew it had gone on long enough.
So I took my stand
and looked ‘em all over.
“well,” I said,
“I don’t know much,
but from the sound of it
you’re all pretty fuckin’ miserable.”